Apples anyone?

Some guys have it all. Good looks, piles of money, athletic abilities, hot female companions, intelligence, etc. Some of you might be wondering why I'm boasting about myself, but I want to point out that I don't actually have piles of money, so it can't be me.... hehe (I was amused) I'm talking about Tom Brady. Well, recently, I was reading golf digest and they had rankings of the top athlete golfers in the world. Tom Brady was on that list. He's an 8 handicap. Guess who's handicap is a 7.7? ME! YOU LIKE APPLES TOMMY BOY?! HOW BOUT THEM APPLES? ok, so it's not much, but it's something.

Captain Retardo

So I have this friend (who we shall refer to as Captain Retardo) who is apparently the dumbest human being ever to walk the face of the earth. A few people had been telling him that his clutch on his car was going out and needed to be replaced. Last Sunday, he parked his car at a park and ride and carpooled up to Seattle for a golf tournament. When he got back, he started up his car and was driving away when his car stalled on him. So, he started it up again and when he tried to accelerate, his clutch wouldn't catch. He turned on his hazard lights and coasted into the nearest parking lot. Knowing that his clutch was blown, he called a tow truck and then called his wife who took him to get a rental car. The next morning, he called up the shop and they told him they'd take a look at it and call him back. After waiting all morning, he got impatient and called them to ask how much his new clutch would cost him. The answer, "Your clutch is fine sir." He insisted that his clutch had given out and even the tow truck man had tried and confirmed his diagnosis! The polite lady on the other line informed him, "sir, your problem was that your car ran out of gas. We put in 5 gallons of gas in it and it's fine. We drove it around and tried as hard as we could to try to get the clutch to slip and it wouldn't." So my friend, Captain Retardo, learned two valuable lessons that day. He found an honest mechanic who he could trust, and he is a complete moron. The unfortunate ending to this story is the fact that this Captain Retardo not actually my friend. He is me. =( I am sad to be me.

Smorgasbord-a Swedish word which refers to a type of Scandinavian meal served buffet-style

1. Camping with the high-school group

The kiddos during worship trying to stay occupied.

I didn't know that Oregon had beaches like this!

Catch!

Young love blossoming...

Esther's hair muse.

Esther has aspirations of being a hair dresser.

Something about the tent and sleeping bag that makes you sleep like a baby.

2. LPGA Safeway Classic.

Jeon Jang

Pak Se-Ri, Korean player, LPGA Hall-of Famer.

But, what's up with the wacky pajama looking outfit?!

Lorena Ochoa, #1 player in the world.

She's 120 lbs. and supposedly hits it 290 yards!

Morgan Pressel, alleged LPGA brat who actually impressed as a very gracious pro-am player, unlike the Korean players who completely ignore their pro-am partners.

3. Funny pictures from Mexico

Welcome to Mexico amigo!

hehe do you see what I see?

This dude must have an incredible personality and confidence. Good for you amigo!

This picture is for my friend Turbo. He used to say, "Do you know my friend Chata? Chata the *blank* up." When I saw this sign, I had to take a picture.

hehe nuff said. A week after we went to Mexico, Brent and Irene went to the same place. Turns out Brent saw this same sign and laughed and took a picture. Great minds think alike.

Dude couldn't find a swim suit so he decided to just throw on some spandex. Riiiiiiiiiight...

There was group of Europeans who just sat by the pool all day. This guy was one of them. I don't know what's more amazing, the sunburn or the animal patch. hehe

New post

It's been a long time since I posted anything. I don't even remember what all has been happening since the last time I posted. We did recently go to Mexico for a week. A few things I learned about Puerto Vallarta.
1. Go on the Los Veranos canopy tour if you go to PV! I hate thrill-seeking type activities, but this was actually a blast.
2. If possible, don't go to PV. hehe
3. There is better Mexican food in America than Mexico. Not only is the Mexican food better in America, it's cheaper in America! Now, I have no problem with spending money on good food, but I hate spending money on bad food. Ok. Maybe bad is an overstatement. Average food. I guess I shouldn't be surprised by that since there's better Korean food in America than Korea. I digress...
4. You can't go anywhere and do anything in PV without being solicited by tour guides, merchants, or time share people. And they always say "almost free!" Beware of anybody who tells you "almost free" in life. Nothing is free. NOTHING.
5. When it rains in PV, you don't want to be close to the ocean. All the water runs downhill to the ocean where it then drains. Unfortunately, when it rains, it pours. And when it pours, the drains back up and so does the sewage. And then the taxi drivers won't take you back to the hotel because the streets are too flooded. And then you'll have to sit in the restaurant for a couple hours waiting for the rain to stop. But it doesn't stop, so after a few hours of sitting in a restaurant, you decide to make a run for it, after all, it's only 12 blocks. And then you walk 12 blocks in a torrential downpour in knee high, swift current, sewage/rain water. And by the time you get back to the hotel, you're soaked in nasty grime and have to stand in the shower for an hour until you feel clean enough to face the world again. And you'll probably end up just throwing away all the clothes and sandals you were wearing at the time. Just some advice. Based on experience.
6. After eating fajitas for days, we got sick of Mexican food and pizza sounded so good. One night, instead of ordering room service, we ordered pizza. DUDE! The pizza is definitely better in America than Mexico! You might think, how bad can pizza be? After all, pizza is like sex, even when it's not good, it's still pretty good. NOT SO! Never order pizza in Mexico.
7. I'm proud to say that Esther and I didn't buy a single souvenir. We actually don't ever buy souvenirs. In our house we refer to souvenirs as clutter. In order to accomplish this, I had to say "no gracias" 12234720987203984 times.
8. Overall, though I may sound a tad bitter, I had a great time. Mostly just relaxing by the pool and reading and spending time with Esther. I suppose that the beauty of traveling is found in the memories and experiences. So even the memory and experience of walking 12 blocks in knee high sewage water is priceless. I have decided though, that our next out of country experience will not be Mexico. Esther, in fact, has already requested Italy and Korea as our next trips. If we go to Italy and the Italian food is better here than in Italy, I swear, I'll never leave the States again!